Chasing starlings from my feeder is the most exhausting part of the process, mostly because these jerks don't take a hint. They swarm in, and I have to head to my back door to shoo them away. The funny thing is the second the door knob turns, they know they need to dip. Before the door is even open, they're off the feeder. If they want to push their luck, they just move to the tree, but the second I actually open the door they're gone. Some days, they'll continue to try and try and try, and then I shoo and shoo and shoo. It's definitely got that Groundhog Day feel, but I'm not giving this one up.
I was watching the starlings yet again today, and I thought about an analogy as I do all the damn time. I thought about the "starlings" in my life. I thought about the battles I fight over and over - many of those are with myself.
I was also thinking about how often I let those "starlings" in my life stick around for far too long. Instead of doing that shooing in my life, I let them take over. I let them have all the power over me, and it holds me back. The "starlings" come in many forms - They come in fear, extreme "What if?" scenarios, self-doubt, overthinking all the things, and so on and so on.
As I wrote last week, I'm trying to be more like the blue jay. I realized as I reflected today that is also going to mean addressing some of these "starlings" that always tend to come for me. My therapist told me once that the biggest lie anxiety tells us is that we need it. It literally fools us into thinking it's a necessary part of a process. The key is changing the default process, so that's not the way that it is.
Like much of what I reflect on, it's a work in progress. I've been trying to figure out some plans and dreams these past few weeks. It's been a frustrating process, mostly because I have let those darn "starlings" get in the way. Now that I can see they're there, it's taking the time to give them a shoo, so I can get where I want and need to go.
Until my next ornitho-themed analogy!
Oh, and while looking for a picture about starlings, I found this, and it made my life, so I'll end this post with this solid meme.
